The joys of days woven together in time
Memories like snapshots of smiles and of tears
Grafted into life
Making me thankful
Even though you're there and I'm here.
Simple meals and Price Chopper runs
A slower time with less to be done
Candy corn and peanuts
Now a fall favorite treat of mine
Not a breakfast kind of girl
But a chocolate crossiant is irresistable
A boccee ball partner, sloping waterfront boundary
I'm the weakest link, but no matter, you put up with me
Shopping bags, sandals
Converstation shared through dressing room walls
Pepsi and pedicures
Football games enjoyed in a condo cheaply warmed
Babies and bellies
Life is full, and will never be the same
Memory of an empty road as I watched you drive away
A mommy's prayer to heaven raised
Cars full of cousins- trips to the farm and lake made
There are so many more, the words a blanket I weave
That you may be wrapped in my love and memories

For the love of belated-birthday posts, Sisters, admiration and many more memories to make,
Me

Happy Belated Birthday Day Abbey

[Dear Self] When You're 30 Edition

People assume you're responsibly awake and start your day before 7am.

You will get texts wishing you a Happiest of Days starting at 6:30.

Your dad will apologize for waking you up with his call, and emphasize that he did purposely wait "a while" before calling!

Your mom will visit; take you shopping and out to eat, 

You'll talk like friends and soak up the time.

The crab cakes, seared tuna-salad, and ice tea will leave you full and you'll forgo dessert 

What?  

Yep, no dessert.

You'll shop for sales, even though your birthday cash is taunting, begging to burn a hole in your pocket, and 6 days later you'll still have cash to spend. 

The gifts of time and thoughtfulness will be your favorites; 

A homemade card that reads "I love you very much, your just SO old I can't believe your 30 and Awesome" - Ethan.

Coffee and time stolen away while children attend school.

Jewelry that looks just like me.

To end the night you won't attend an elaborate surprise party (cause that not your husband's style),  

But you will be surprised,

And you'll celebrate with family and friends from far and near via video.

You'll cry and roll with laughter as your watch and listen to the singing of happy birthday, 

and memories recounted in both words and acting.

You'll find out that cake, candy and cooking are what some people love most about you. 

Compliments roll off Charlie's tongue and Ethan wants to go on Wipe Out to win you 50,000 dollars.

You'll rewind and re-watch your nephews- songs, "I love you" proclamations, and silly faces.

Most of all you'll be humbled, and honored to be called a Christ follower, a good mom, and great friend among other things.

The words of love, praise and encouragement from those who mean so much to you will overflow your cup already so full and continue to echo in your mind building you up and reminding you keep being YOU.

For the love of turning 30, laughter, tears, shopping, coffee and expressions of love

Me

Jamie Rocket

My face rested against your chest, your arms encompassed me

And the tears rolled down my cheeks

But

The laughter echoes in my heart - I can picture the bedtime chaos and it makes me smile

Miles separate, conversations bridge the distance

A scene burned into my memory replays - and I miss you, again

For the love of a weekend set aside to come home, and nephew-coined nicknames,
Me

Brothers, Baby bottles, Beauty Rest and Lots of...

For the grand-total of 2.5 days I was responsible for 4-children

- that's two more children than hands!
We acquired a pair of brothers, from my brother while he and my sister visited the Windy City for the Tool-show, which Jacob made several puns about
-that's my guy, I just laugh with him!

The brothers like, my pair are 15 months apart, one is spunky - the other chill
-I give a cyber-pat on the back to myself, and every-other mom of multiple children-less than 2yrs apart out there, what were we thinking 

They are both in diapers, and for some-reason my two think diapers are both gross and hilarious

My diaper skills were tested but I came out unscathed
-I almost forgot how great potty trained children are (note: trained, past tense -as in done training because that part is not so great), 

One is lovingly nick-named "the stinky monster" - the other "sweet boy" (a'la E and C)

One drinks from a bottle - the other anything he can get his hands on

-I remembered how much I dislike formula; the smell, the sticky residue that clings to my counters, and..I can't think of why else, but the smell alone should be enough.  
My broom and pick up skills may have been perfected
-Additionally, my floor would like to thank the maker of sippy-cups, lids and straws - whoever you are

It was a lot of work
My husband pitched in a lot 

We had a lot of fun

We didn't get a lot of sleep

I drank a lot of coffee

And I pose a question how does the mom of four shower on a regular basis?

For the love of nephews and a lot more good times to come
Me

Eggs etc.

Remember the movie Run Away Bride?
She kept running because, turns out she didn't know who she really was
I was that girl -
the one that wanted the brand name clothes so I'd be the same as you
and the one who liked the music on your radio, because it was yours
and the one who compromised
and the one who lost her way

But I'm not that girl anymore
And most of it started when I met him - my tall-skinny, dark haired-brown eyed, knight in shining armour who also doubled for court jester
Simply because, he liked me just the way I was
And he still does...

It just feels really great to be me
I'm far from perfect
But I'm forgiven
And although I haven't run (okay lets face it an 11 min mile isn't really running)
So, I haven't jogged in over 4 weeks, my weight's still down AND
I can squeeze into my skinny jeans - the only problem with squeezing is the muffin top that squishes out the top
Jacob says the top of the muffin is the best part...
I put the jeans back into the closet!
I love being a mom, and my kids make me smile as well as prematurely gray
I have great friends
My family is amazing and I love them
Sometimes I say awesome with a very non-awesome connotation
I miss Josh and Abbey
Coffee is best with conversation; and Starbucks, although over-priced, is my favorite
My spaghetti sauce comes from a jar and the brand is Classico
I wish Extra still made the Winter fresh flavor, but Cobalt is a fare substitute
Buying in bulk at Sam's doesn't always save me $ (did you know chocolate raisins come in bulk?)
I'm so excited for Jonas and Megan, awe love!
Redecorating our house has been so much fun, just wish the budget was unlimited
Can't wait to hang my new art-work in my refurbished rooms
I'm praying for this girl
I like my eggs scrambled, just slightly overcooked so they're not watery with lots of salt topped with sharp cheddar cheese, AND over-medium, AND as a veggie omelet, AND as an egg sandwich (whole wheat toast- american cheese and mustard), BUT NOT covered in hollandase.

Not everyday feels this good to be me
But I'm glad today does!

--How do you take your eggs?

A Little PIece of Heaven

In paradise with those who know me best
Flaws and all, frustrations and forgiveness
Joy found in building a sand castle, just to watch the waves wash it away
Peace in the beauty of a sunset while cradled by my husbands arms
Knowing the love that's meant in my dad's rough-housing
Prepping asparagus with a brother, cooking fresh fish, making strawberry shortcake
Getting to know a girl I hope to one day call sister
Listening to my little brother sound just like dad
Watching the excitement of my kids, that's found in contentment with what's around them.
Caring for the tough brother after a jelly fish attack
Chasing a nephew, cuddling the other
Chatting and sharing life with the sister I miss so dearly when I'm at home burried in life
Hugging mom and admiring how she works tirelessly, requiring no recognition
Taking mental (and digital) snapshots of mom and dad being grandparents, loving parents, good friends and in love
Wonder in the beauty of God's creation and the awesomeness of his creativity
Cherishing my husband, and how he notices and cares for me and our children
Listening, really listening to God in my devotion time
Splashing and swimming in the pool, feeding fish and rinsing off sandy feet
Being a daughter
Being a sister
Being a wife
Being a mom
Being an aunt
Being a friend
Being a child of God
Surrounded by children of God
There's not much on earth that's better than this.
Peace-Waves-Sunshine and Joy
Love
me

Messy Mortar

I had never noticed it before
And now everytime I glance east toward the powder blue covered bricks
I'm reminded of you
The truck was packed, but we just lingered in the drive
Our eyes focused toward the ground, and our feet picked awkardly at the concrete
We didn't want you to go
But, we were the only reason you would have stayed
I cried
Instead of crying you commented on the mortar
And we all laughed,
I cried some more, so did you
We all hugged and you drove away
I'm looking to spending sometime together this weekend - Jacob's really looking forward to fishing, I'm really looking forward to talking, cuddling Jace, and chasing Briggs around.
Thanks for making me laugh and giving me something so close, as my neighbors crappy brick-job, to remind me of you.
Miss you still

Sentimental

Maybe I don't clean out the closets as often as I should...
The tiny tees and the frilly dresses
The worn, hole-ridden jeans
They all seem so small, and I wonder at how you got to be so big.

Maybe I forget some of the stuff I've "hidden" away
At least Jacob, claims I hide things
I'd like to classify myself as an organized-piler
Problem with piling things away is sometimes, you find them when least expected
The dark purple KSU socks meant to cover tiny feet
Tiny feet that now tread the streets of gold

Maybe I don't call as often as I should
And maybe it's because every time we talk I miss you like the first time
I wish you were here, but I can't picture myself there
And I'm sorry

Maybe I'm just hormonal
But when I watch you hold him
I have to blink back the tears
You're such a sweet big-brother
The way your eyes gaze at him and how he stares back at you, your sweet "hi-baby"
Why do we talk with such sugary-shrill voices to newborns? Do they hear us better?

Maybe I wonder how she would have changed our lives
But mostly I'm just thankful

Truth Is...

I turned 28 this year.
I'm not a "runner", but I ran 5 miles today.
I am a size XXX (Just kidding- not posting for the world to read), I'll let you know when I'm back in a size 10!
It was a really good day, the kind that makes me happy to be a mom, a wife, a friend, and forgiven.
I have three cavities (blah).
The world doesn't tell the truth (very often).
I need to remind myself what's true.
I am beautiful.
The inside of me is just as much a work-in-progress as the outside.
AND That's okay.
No one is perfect.
I'm really happy for Jonas.
I am so thankful for Jacob, and watching him do the dishes makes me smile.
I am blessed with great friends.
I miss Josh and Abbey.
I was raised in a wonderful family, and they're still wonderful.
No family is perfect, and I can not expect to have the first.
There's a small part of me that's dysfunctional and dramatic.
It's only a small part.
I'm forgiven.
I didn't read my Bible today.
I need to spend more time in the Word.
I want to know my Savior more, so I can be more like Him.
I've felt pain.
Today I'm filled with joy and contentment.
I look forward to meeting my baby-girl in heaven someday.
I cherish the children who are here on this earth with me.
Something we need more of.
I'm smiling and I hope you are too.

Briggs

Happy Birthday Nephew

Today your turn one.
We waited patiently for your birth.
You mommy struggled to bring you into this world.
It was all worth it when she held you.

Today you...
Crawl because it's faster than walking
Love food
Laugh and smile
Are happy, when you get your way
Are a little stubborn
Have an ornery grin, like daddy
Already push and test your boundaries
Are sweet
Gave me a big hug (you don't give hugs like that very often)
Love to be a part of your cousins play
Like to hear music
Can say "ball" "dog" and we think you say "Josh" instead of daddy
You shake your head 'no' or laugh when asked to say mommy (Stinker!)

I wish I could be with you more,but I cherish the time I have with you.
You're going to be a good big-brother.
You're going to challenge dad and mom.
You're so loved by this family God has placed you in.

Happy Birthday little buddy

Abbey

Life-group, Wednesday.
Question -have you witnessed someones life pre and post-Christ
And describe...
I did, and Jacob said I should tell you, but it's easier for me to write and I know you read so...I'm telling you

You were always a sweet loving person
Who made good decisions
You loved Josh and had a true interest in the word
You believed
And it's been amazing watching you grow
You're still just as sweet
You are an inspiration to me, what a Christian wife should be
Content where you are, in the moment you're in
Supportive of Joshua and submissive in a way I struggle to be
I remember praying with you (I still pray for you) before you were pregnant with Briggs
That God would help you to be a faithful Christian mother, that you would believe you could be, and that God would bless your family.
HE has, and YOU are!
I am so glad God put you in my forever family.
I love you so much!