An honest reflection of me- in fragments. Imperfect- Grace Covered. Balance. Mom. Wife.
Nurse. Homeschool Teacher. Christ follower first. Second changes. Thankful.

Why You Don't Really Need Life-Group

Wednesday, June 11, 2014

The house is hurriedly swept, papers stashed, candles that smell of cookies lit, laundry hidden away, dinner inhaled - dishes entombed, and coffee pressed. Creamer stands in rows like little soldiers flanked by mismatched cups awaiting orders, drink orders, on a white counter top.  While the Aztec candy bowl anticipates little fingers, and big ones too. It's a routine of hospitality and love.

We've visited each other in the hospital
Post babies and post surgery for cancer
We've been rocked by the hurt that happens with sin
And gently rocked each other's little ones to sleep
We've watched fireworks together
Thrown water balloons at each other
Shared our first Passover meal together
Rang in the New Year together
Wii boxed and Just-Danced our way to exhaustion
And eaten lots of BBQ together
We've shared our hurts, and held each other up when by ourselves we were inadequate;
Through the pain of miscarriage
The unknown of jobs lost
The draining emotion of cancer
Trying and tiring lupus symptoms
The uncontrollable cycles of OCD and anxiety
The loss of loved ones
Difficult pregnancies
And concussion dysfunction
We've put band aids on imaginary owies of toddlers
And bandaged our hearts following the loss of a relationship
We've written notes of encouragement and opened the Word together
We've prayed for healing, for sleep, for repentance, for jobs, for perseverance, for babies, for help, for wisdom, for understanding, for courage, for patience, for speech, for school decisions, for sanity,  to do what's right, to say no, to know when to say yes, and for forgiveness
We've held each other accountable and given each other grace
We've laid hands on friends leaving
And eaten lots of brownies - LOTS
We've laughed together
And Cried together
We've Listened to each other
Not known what to say
Sat in silence together
Conquered fears together
And challenged each other
We've shared stories, tools, talents, dreams, and time
We've made meals for each other
Raked leaves for others
Watched movies together
Enjoyed the lake together
Decorated for VBS and Fall Fun Fest together
And walked neighborhoods collecting food bank donations together
We've painted rooms, repaired dry wall
Moved furniture, and play sets
And babysat for each other
We've asked each other for help
We've worried for each other
And been encouraged by one another
We've shared joy, celebrated with each other because when someone you love is rejoicing you do too; Babies by adoption and babies by the other way
New jobs
Promotions at old jobs
The feat of potty training completion
And watching those babies grow up and choose to be baptized
We've shared in the difficulties of parenting, having in-laws, marriage, single-ness, work stress, and choices
We've trudged upstream amidst life's trials
And floated down river together, both figuratively and literally

When you spend once a week times nine years together the friendship that grew from coffee, a bowl of candy and brownies morphs into more.  Into family.  Because it's not about obedience or hospitality.  It's about the life that's lived in between the weekly coffee and creamer. The life that's shared. It's in the BBQ eaten and the movies watched and the girl's nights and the way they love your kids. It's in the way they listen, and how you feel comfortable sharing your needs and imperfections with them.

So when the floors don't get swept, and the laundry hangs on the couch instead of in the closet, and the creamer isn't standing at attention, they pretend not to notice, any of it - the clothes, the dirt, and the missing creamer. They move past the mess, hug you on the way to grab a mug and open the fridge to find the creamer.

So, you see - you don't really need a life-group
You don't need to give away one night a week
You don't need to be vulnerable or let people into your business
You may not think you need prayer
Or people to listen to you
Or people to be quiet with you
Truth is, Life-group doesn't make life easier
But it does make it better
And you'll have more brownies

I choose brownies,
And life lived in between weekly coffee and creamer
Because I do need it.

Share this Post Share to Facebook Share to Twitter Email This Pin This Share on Google Plus Share on Tumblr


kc_hawkeye said...

I consider myself a decent writer, but after being lovingly reminded of what life group is all about, all I can say is beautifully put, heartfelt and looking forward to sharing life

Marisa Slusarcyk said...

You write beautifully and it is amazing how a friendship can grow without us really trying or even knowing until we look back on those memories! God bless you and yours! Thank you for sharing

Anonymous said...

the word together really stood out to me. I don't like creamer in my coffee,but it's not about creamer but the love that makes the creamer available.I think it's great that there is a together we have set up for fellowship many times through the church through neighbors and the people get excited about a concept no one ever got real it's never last morethen a couple of months.pains and struggles in life come, but the fellowship have people to share them with through the long haul truly is a gift from the Lordbut it only works if people together decide to be vulnerable and when people decide it's not worth it there's a very lonely sense of rejection that echoes inthe hollow of your being.thank you for sharing it helps me remember there are places where fellowship works and people focus on each other and not themselves. God bless you.

Favorite Reflections

  • I've been on a silent journey For a year, I explained the pain and weakness away, it was the gardening or hormones or in my hea...
  • Dear Baby Girl (you're gone) -- You would be five, but your body never was and instead you're just a beautiful soul I don'...
  • The word rolled off her tongue and I was frozen I couldn't have just heard what my brain is telling me I heard Not from her, Beautifu...
  • The house is hurriedly swept, papers stashed, candles that smell of cookies lit, laundry hidden away, dinner inhaled - dishes entombed, and...
  • Being a nurse was always where my heart was set So all the Sunday dinners I missed I can not regret Because caring for others' hurts, ...
  • There's orange shag carpet covering the floor Cards slide across the wooden table as kids make sound effects from behind the couch The...
  • My sweet sisters, You proudly proclaim God as sovereign and Lord and resign to His timing in so much of your life,  But, concer...
  • It's a mindless phrase I pray Dear Heavenly Father, Thank you for this day But today A wife woke up to an empty place in her bed ...
  • To all the Mom's  Sacrifice comes easy at first, it starts with your body and then it's your sleep - until you realize it'...
  • I sat on top of a mountain The majesty of creation stretched before me Pairs of eyes gazed into mine With quivering knees A vulnerable h...