An honest reflection of me- in fragments. Imperfect- Grace Covered. Balance. Mom. Wife.
Nurse. Homeschool Teacher. Christ follower first. Second changes. Thankful.


Saturday, November 21, 2009

Life-group, Wednesday.
Question -have you witnessed someones life pre and post-Christ
And describe...
I did, and Jacob said I should tell you, but it's easier for me to write and I know you read so...I'm telling you

You were always a sweet loving person
Who made good decisions
You loved Josh and had a true interest in the word
You believed
And it's been amazing watching you grow
You're still just as sweet
You are an inspiration to me, what a Christian wife should be
Content where you are, in the moment you're in
Supportive of Joshua and submissive in a way I struggle to be
I remember praying with you (I still pray for you) before you were pregnant with Briggs
That God would help you to be a faithful Christian mother, that you would believe you could be, and that God would bless your family.
HE has, and YOU are!
I am so glad God put you in my forever family.
I love you so much!
Share this Post Share to Facebook Share to Twitter Email This Pin This Share on Google Plus Share on Tumblr

The "A"

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Today I decided to decorate for Christmas.
The house is clean, the kids excited
And no foreseeable time in the near future following Thanksgiving to get it done

It was great fun watching the kids pull-garland and lights from the boxes
And then we pulled-out the stockings and stocking holder
Last year on clearance I bought "PEACE"
5 - stocking holders, expecting there to be an extra stocking this year
And I just stood there as the tears welled up in my eyes and stared at the empty "A"
Ethan looked at me with inquisitive eyes
I sat down on the couch, and he hugged me
And I cried

Ethan, unable to understand and just too excited and busy hopped up and started rummaging through the boxes
He brought me a star, and inside this star was Mary holding baby Jesus
We took it together to the empty "A" and filled it with Jesus

Flooded with emotions I just cried, and cried some more
Thoughts of...
The little baby girl I don't get to share Christmas with
Other friends who are missing the same
My little brother, who was supposed to be married this Christmas
Soldiers fighting for us far away
Families struggling without jobs
Heartache, Struggle, Pain

Share this Post Share to Facebook Share to Twitter Email This Pin This Share on Google Plus Share on Tumblr

A week in the life of...

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Monday was our only "normal" day at home -

I enjoyed the kids. I made organized piles. Did some laundry - but didn't' fold it.
Redirected when the screaming started. Kept my cool. Put away clean clothes. Unpacked. Played. Laughed. Made a budget and paid bills. Got tackled. Pretended to be a monster. Got put in jail. Promised to be nice and got out of jail. Kissed Jacob. Was treated to dinner out to celebrate Jacob's birthday with my in-laws. Ate cake. Hugged the kids. Prayed with Charlie. Ethan prayed with daddy. Snuggled up with Jacob. Watched TV. Prayed. Slept soundly cuddled in Jacob's arms.

Tuesday I went to MOPS. Disappointed and hurt a friend. Apologized. Felt guilty. Accepted her forgiveness. Still need to give her a hug (and it's Friday).
Hugged mom and Abbey. Let Charlie sleep in the car. Stole some chocolate goldfish from Briggs. Shopped for picture outfits. Chased Ethan and Charlie around clothing racks. Made them sit in the stroller. Listened to Charlie cry. Sent my tired kids home with Jacob. Found Jacob a sweater. Didn't buy anything for me. Relished my time with my family. Clapped with Briggs. Smiled. Wished we were closer (in distance). Was sad to say goodbye. Went to work. Talked to Amy on the way. Got floated. Had a bad attitude. Fixed my attitude. Held babies. Tried hard not to fall asleep. Took a break. Held more babies. Drove home to my babies.

Wednesday (and so tired). Enjoyed hearing "Maaaamee," as E and C rushed into my arms. Hugged them. Kissed them. Remembered how much I miss them. Smiled. Talked with Alicia. Pulled already packed lunches from the fridge. Got the kids loaded in the car. Listened to silly songs. Dropped them off. Prayed. Went to bed after checking facebook. Could have - Should have just gone to bed. Slept for 4 hours. Showered. Put on new clothes. Picked up E and C. Played outside. Drank hot-chocolate with marshmallows on top. Read books. Cooked dinner. Ate dinner. Drove to work. Prayed. Worked.

Thursday (not as tired as Wednesday morning, but tired). Called Jacob on my way home. Prayed. Repeat Wednesday morning go-to-school routine. Go to bed, without checking facebook. Prayed. Slept for 3.5 hours (because I just couldn't sleep). Picked up the kids. Listened to silly songs. Made cookies. Decorated cookies - Wildcats and Stars. Built with blocks. Hugged and kissed Jacob. Made breakfast for dinner. Ate breakfast for dinner. YUM. Watched Jacob get tackled. Laughed. Watched the kids beg for Jacob to throw them. Watched the kids get thrown. Drank tea. Put on make-up and deodorant. Hugged and kissed all members of my family. Drove to work again. Prayed. Worked. Wrote. Internet shopped and surfed. Worked some more. Looked forward to the end of a long week.
One more tired-drive-home to drive. One more go-to-school routine to finish. 3-4 hours of sleep to catch. Silly songs to listen to. Lots of pretend to play. Appointment with the cable co. Time to spend with Jacob. And real-sleep, at night, when it's dark and you're supposed to be sleeping.

Relishing the fun we have together.
Striving to be a better friend, wife and mom.
Trying not to get bogged down by lack-of-sleep.
Smiling. Laughing. Hugging and kissing.
Storing away what "busy" feels like now, and cherishing each moment I have.
Share this Post Share to Facebook Share to Twitter Email This Pin This Share on Google Plus Share on Tumblr

Hey World...

Thursday, November 5, 2009

I have an amazing husband!
Today is his birthday - he is 28.
I don't know who reads my blog - but I do hope that someday our kids will.
I hope they will see I'm a real person with failures, and embarrassing moments and I hope they read this post and think I want to be a husband/ have a husband just like that.

Jacob --
You hold my hand, and always kiss me goodbye
I should thank your dad for teaching you chivalry
From the day we met until now, you open doors for me and guide me through - your hand on the small of my back (I love that about you)
You pray for me
You are honest
You listen
You are silly with me
You make me laugh (and you know you're funny)
You always do the dishes, today I cleaned the kitchen and did dishes before you got home from work (Happy Birthday!)
You take out the trash and help with the laundry
You hold me close and make me feel safe
You let me cry on your shoulder, but you hate it when I cry
You are laid-back and my perfect match (I don't need to describe myself for you to know that I'm not laid-back)
You put-up with me :)
You support me

I love you
You are an amazing husband and I am blessed to be your wife!

Happy Birthday Sweetheart
Share this Post Share to Facebook Share to Twitter Email This Pin This Share on Google Plus Share on Tumblr

Favorite Reflections

  • I've been on a silent journey For a year, I explained the pain and weakness away, it was the gardening or hormones or in my hea...
  • Dear Baby Girl (you're gone) -- You would be five, but your body never was and instead you're just a beautiful soul I don'...
  • The word rolled off her tongue and I was frozen I couldn't have just heard what my brain is telling me I heard Not from her, Beautifu...
  • The house is hurriedly swept, papers stashed, candles that smell of cookies lit, laundry hidden away, dinner inhaled - dishes entombed, and...
  • There's orange shag carpet covering the floor Cards slide across the wooden table as kids make sound effects from behind the couch The...
  • My sweet sisters, You proudly proclaim God as sovereign and Lord and resign to His timing in so much of your life,  But, concer...
  • It's a mindless phrase I pray Dear Heavenly Father, Thank you for this day But today A wife woke up to an empty place in her bed ...
  • I sat on top of a mountain The majesty of creation stretched before me Pairs of eyes gazed into mine With quivering knees A vulnerable h...
  • To all the Mom's  Sacrifice comes easy at first, it starts with your body and then it's your sleep - until you realize it'...
  • My Sunday looks a lot like yours. The outfit is never quite right then I get toothpaste on my shirt (just me?) The kids are arguing about...