An honest reflection of me- in fragments. Imperfect- Grace Covered. Balance. Mom. Wife.
Nurse. Homeschool Teacher. Christ follower first. Second changes. Thankful.


Monday, December 9, 2013

The mini-me's and I were talking about coupon-ing.
Since when did the practice of redeeming coupons become it's own verb?
We can save 40% at Michaels on craft stuff for the cousins,
$25 off at Macy's - maybe this will be the year I find boots,
Another $10 savings at ToysRUs for stocking stuffers
CVS offers us $3 off because of all the antibiotics we've been downing.

But the coupon by itself is virtually worthless, a meager 1/100 of one cent.
Though a penny saved is a penny earned, there is not a single store who will or can offer you that 1/100 of a cent?
And my big thinker asked - so why do they give it a value if it isn't really worth anything?
-Good question

The coupon's worth is recognized only when redeemed.
And then I saw my life.
All our lives.
Circulating in this world, surrounded by others and striving for lives of merit.
Without redemption, we are a piece of print, holding the promise of great value and purpose but void of significance.
We can only find value when our life is redeemed by our maker.

There a pieces of me that feel less valuable than 1/100 of a cent.
There are days I feel inadequate, even worthless.
Unfit for anything or anyone.
But if I pause to listen, 
Block out the lies that have penetrated for too long
When I let myself hear the truth 
Truth, from the One who made me, the One who knows my potential, the One who gives me value, the One who waits patiently on me, the One who gives me more grace, the One who has a plan for my life
I hear Him say
"You are valuable.  You are Mine.  A daughter of the King.  Irrevocably adopted.
REDEEMED through the blood of My Son.
An act that can never be undone."

And I believe Him.

So what's your life worth?
Are you ready to feel valued, because to Him you're worth more than you can imagine.
He's not dying to know you.
He already knows you.
And He already died, one time, for everyone, for every sin, for our redemption.
Now He's just patiently waiting.
Waiting, for you to turn yourself in.

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Walking Dead

Thursday, December 5, 2013

We buy into a facade of living
Presented glamorously in advertisements, woven into lyrics, and disguised as reality in scripted television
We live comfortably
Surrounded by beautiful distractions
Busy, Loud, Fast lives

In our comfort, is complacency
When the occupying busyness fades we're unfulfilled
Without diversion we're void
The quiet is uncomfortable and the stillness is empty

Busy, uncomfortable in silence, dragged down by the facade of reality instead of living in my own
That used to be me
Well, I'm still busy
But my empty days are beautiful, and more fulfilling than any completed project
I envy the writers and preachers immersed in the word, connected with the Father day after day
I long for a day of void
My soul craves a day, an hour, an intense intentional time that I can fill with Jesus
Learn from Him, Talk to Him, Be filled up by Him
Today, I scraped together 15 minutes
And I had to push her off my Bible to read His letter

In our time together,
I watched Him take the hand of a lifeless little one and when He said get up, she did.
I listened as He told me that He can still raise the dead.
Isn't that what we are without Him?
Walking Dead.
And, that is why no amount of stuff, or projects, or accomplishments or busyness that can fill us up?
Because on the inside we are dead.
The external is just a facade, a lie, a coat of paint we put on to cover the decay of our own souls.

But He can raise the dead.
He took my life,
Self-focused, busy, loud, prideful, tainted by worldly desires and full of missteps.
And He washed it all away,
He gave me a new name, a purpose, and made me alive on the inside.
Now anything I do on the outside is for His glory.
And while I'm working on WHAT exactly He is asking me to do.
I rest that nothing can steal the life that I feel in the quiet, in my time with Him.
My fullness is in the void because it's saturated with Him.

For the Love of quiet time, cats, finding pockets of empty time to be intentional, and being alive,

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