An honest reflection of me- in fragments. Imperfect- Grace Covered. Balance. Mom. Wife.
Nurse. Homeschool Teacher. Christ follower first. Second changes. Thankful.

My Teacher The Past

Wednesday, June 4, 2014


The events of the past can not be undone
There are days I wish I could undo them
And moments when we sit and laugh at the times of uncertainty
In our limited view we ask questions that need not be asked 
And we lack answers for the questions that require simple faith 

The bravest choice my parents ever made
Was to let me learn
To let me fail
To let me come to a place where I needed HIM
Unable to see the future they prayed for me, fought for me, and waited for me


HE knew the path I would choose
HE knew how I would hurt HIM, and avoid HIM, 
It wasn't okay, but HE also knew how I would come to need HIM
For in that place of sin, of failure of need
I would learn
Learn from my mistakes, and doubts and questions and lies
Learn 
How HE had always been there and always would be
Learn, How I took Him for granted
How I didn't understand Him
Learn, How doubt isn't always a bad thing
But how ignoring Him always is
I thought there was something I could do to keep Him close or that my choices would push Him away - 
Turns out
HE is always the SAME
It's me who changes






















The effects of my choices, and my learning are sensed in the now
I can not undo the sin
But Jesus has covered it 
And when I reflect on the person I was
I don't see the ugly choices - all I see is the learning
The grace
The waiting
The praying
The faith that was growing, and becoming my own
I was broken and conflicted
I am not anymore
But it's not because I'm special 
It's because I'm surrendered
Surrendered to a GOD who is always the SAME
And a miracle worker
And changing me
Working miracles in me

Living in faith isn't easy
But it's freeing
It's beautiful and covered in grace 
Grace that says
There is joy in the everyday, even the days void of happy 
Smile
There is a life of abundance I have planned for you - choose to breathe it in, hear my voice
Live
There is forgiveness for your mistakes, because you're still going to make them 
Accept It
There is light to guide your steps - choose to take the road less traveled
Walk
There is a hope for your future - choose to see beyond this broken world
Believe

What have you learned from your past?









Linking up with #TestimonyTuesday

Holly Barrett
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4 comments:

~Karrilee~ from Abiding Love, Abounding Grace said...

This is so beautiful... and so encouraging to my Mama heart! My daughter just moved out and having to let her go and let her make her own choices and own mistakes is so hard, but so necessary! We are neighbors over at Holly's for Testimony Tuesday! So glad I stopped by!

Anonymous said...

Jamie, what a beautiful post and great reminder that we can and should learn from our pasts. So glad that your parents were able to let you fly! Appreciate you linking up for Testimony Tuesday, friend. Happy weekend!

JamieLGunn said...

Karrilee -- Thanks for stopping by! I am praying for you as you transition into life with your daughter out of your home. Brave momma!

JamieLGunn said...

Holly --
Thanks for providing the link up! Happy to write, share and grow with this community! Happy Saturday!




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